Sluts 101

Whether you use them to get laid more reliably, or to avoid wifeing up the town bike, these cues should be on every man’s slut radar. Sure, there are exceptions to all of them. You could meet a nun with a tattoo, or a ticklish slut, but these are—especially the more of them that are evident—some of most accurate predictors of sluttiness you’ll encounter.

Tattoued slut1. Has tattoos. This is especially the case if they’re visible, multiple, large, and elaborate. If they have sexual themes, you’re in like Flynn.

 

pierced pussy slut2. Piercings outside of the traditional earlobe placement. Sluttiness increases as you radiate from the lobe, to other parts of the ear, to the nose crumb, to the bull-ring. Other parts of the face—and erogenous zones—speak even louder. Or stretching.
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This hot slut and her man goes to the forest where things are quiet in order to make some intense sex.
None of her holes are unfucked and she gets her pierced titties get sprayed by cum.

3. Has “slut face.” You either recognize it or you don’t.

4. Not ticklish. I’ve noticed that girls who aren’t ticklish aren’t so because they’re used to being handled (by men). Almost every prude is super ticklish, while sluts are rarely so. Sluts may have a physical response to light touching, but it’s rarely a tickled sensation.

 

Big tits slut5. Has big tits. They probably came in early, which translates into additional years of male attention.

 

Snow sluts6. Shows excessive skin for weather conditions. Exposes the midriff, lower back, or ass-piece from the bottom of her daisy-dukes even when it’s not super-hot.

 

anal hairy pussy slut7. Has extra body hair (arms, girl-sideburns, girl-mustache) and/or a low speaking voice. This, I’m told, is simple biology. More hair and low voice equals more testosterone. It’s an imperfect metric, though, because women of certain ethnicities are just more hirsute by default.

 

8. Associates with confirmed sluts. Her friends are often one of your best weathervanes. Birds of a feather, as they say.

Sorority slutsSorority sluts Sorority sluts9. Shows interests in girls, has “hooked up” with girls, or claims to be “bi-sexual.” Bi-sexuality has quickly become a stand-in for hyper-sexuality.

10. Is currently, or was at some point, in a sorority. Sororities are little more than pussy buffets for the campus fraternities.

 

Vacations Slut11. Has traveled alone, or with only girls, to fuck-fest locations (e.g., Jamaica). This is often a tell-tale sign of a sex-on-vacation-doesn’t-count case.

 

Cheerleader-Slut12. Was a cheerleader in high school. Cheerleaders have, and exploit, access to the most desirable and horniest dudes at school.

 

threesome-slut13. Went, or goes, to a known party college (e.g., Arizona State, USC, UC Santa Barbara). Girls are copycats, and when all of her friends “are doing it” (whatever “it” is), they do too. (See No. 8.)

 

14. Lost her virginity on the younger side (15 and down).

15. Is an artist, or a wannabe “model” who has done “photo shoots.” Girls in the arts tend to have a loose attitude toward sex, especially if their “art” involves “expressing themselves” with their body.

Colored hair chubby slut colored hair slut16. Hair dyed a nontraditional color (e.g., blue). Like piercings and tattoos, dyed hair telegraphs “rebellion” to social norms. That almost always translates into sluttiness.

 

smoking slut smoking slut17. She smokes (cigarettes). The classic adage has never been more true: if she smokes, she most certainly pokes. A girl who smokes is a natural risk-taker—especially in an age where we’re fully cognizant of dangers of the habit. If she gambles with her pulmonary health, rest assured she also takes risks in her sex life.

 

Drunk slut18. Drinks manly drinks. If a girl orders a whiskey on your first date, close your tab and figure out which one of you lives closer to the bar.
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cosplay slut cosplay slut cosplay slut9. Is into “cosplay.” Dressing up like sexy versions of cartoon and video-game characters is little more than a thinly veiled form of sexual-attention seeking from men.

 

chubby slut Chubby-slut-220. Is somewhat overweight. Girls who dance around the 6 range—especially if it’s because of their dumpy, unfit physiques—are sufficiently attractive to participate in the sexual marketplace, but not cute enough to compete with the real hotties. They’ll make up the difference by being easy.

 

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